Psalm 66:5-12,16-20
“Come and see what God has done; he is awesome in his deeds toward the children of man. He turned the sea into dry land; they passed through the river on foot. There did we rejoice in him, who rules by his might forever, whose eyes keep watch on the nations— let not the rebellious exalt themselves.
Bless our God, O peoples; let the sound of his praise be heard, who has kept our soul among the living and has not let our feet slip. For you, O God, have tested us; you have tried us as silver is tried. You brought us into the net; you laid a crushing burden on our backs; you let men ride over our heads; we went through fire and through water; yet you have brought us out to a place of abundance.
Come and hear, all you who fear God, and I will tell what he has done for my soul. I cried to him with my mouth, and high praise was on my tongue. If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened. But truly God has listened; he has attended to the voice of my prayer.
Blessed be God, because he has not rejected my prayer or removed his steadfast love from me!”
These verses sum up the past couple months so well!! God has done/ is doing awesome things. We praise him and continue to rely on his steadfast love!
We’ve been back in Colorado now for 3 weeks. Words cannot describe HOW GOOD it feels to be back home. Everything feels so easy. And clean. And safe. It’s quiet and it smells good. There’s an endless supply of coffee and vegetables. Man, the U.S. is so great!
We definitely wish the twins were here but wait until you hear about how awesome of a situation they have during this waiting period!! When they heard that Peter and Zion would be coming to Jos, Uncle Dan and his wife Elizabeth VERY graciously offered to have the twins live with them. They’ve only been married for 6 months…you have to have big hearts to welcome rambunctious twin 3-year-old boys into your home as a newly married couple! After they came forward to offer being the boys’ foster parents, they scrambled to find a bigger apartment to rent, sealed the lease agreement, cleaned the new apartment and moved in. All with 10 days notice!
DAY 44
(June 15)
Prep day for the crazy travel day to follow. Lots of emotions swirling this day. Adun came to see us before we left and planned to sleep on our couch one last time. It was nice to have her joyful presence around during the chaos! Peter was extra clingy. He asked me to hold him most of the day (which I didn’t mind). True to form, Zion didn’t seem to grasp what was coming. Ben had said about a week beforehand: “Mom, I’m just going to warn you. I’m probably going to cry when I have to say bye to the twins.” Sure enough, he was a puddle this evening after giving the twins hugs goodnight because he knew they’d be gone early the next morning. Even Luke started bawling. (Not typical for him!) I felt badly for them that they have to deal with such intense sadness but at the same time— it was heart warming to see just how much these big brothers care for their new little brothers in a matter of only 6 weeks together.
It was a stressful day for Dave to say the least. He was about to embark on a journey with the crazy twins by himself. AND he was freaked out about his wife and first 3 boys flying out of Lagos, Nigeria airport without him. We were definitely anxious to get through the next couple days to get everybody where they needed to be.
DAY 45
(June 16)
Travel Day!
The logistics of this day were pretty insane but all things considered— everything went well! It started with Dave leaving at 7:30 am with Peter and Zion to travel to the airport in Lagos. We sent him with snacks and lollipops and a kid leash for one twin plus a baby carrier to wear the other twin on his back. He had two suitcases to check— one with his own clothes and the other to go with the twins to Jos. We had packed up clothes and shoes, vitamins and toys, books and photos of us for them to take with them. (I’ll let Dave write up a summary of his travels.) He flew the boys on an hour flight to Abuja where Uncle Dan was planning to pick up the boys and drive them the 5 hours to Jos. Meanwhile Dave would hang out in Abuja until his evening flight to Frankfurt and then to Denver.
After they left, it was a full day of packing and prepping for us. In the next 8 hours, I got the three boys showered and put the apartment back together (We had moved a lot of fragile things so that the kids wouldn’t damage them while we were there.) Adun helped me go through all of our stuff (kitchen/cleaning items, toiletries, clothes, medical supplies/vitamins, books, toys etc). We tried to bring only what we truly needed back with us. I ended up sending her with 2 large suitcases and 2 carry on suitcases full of things. She was so excited. The things that she and her family didn’t need, she would find homes for in the slums. After weighing and re-packing our suitcases several times, we were ready when Mr. Aina came at 3:30 pm. The five of us went in his minivan while another driver drove our luggage in a second minivan. We soaked in the sights and sounds of Lagos on our slow-going full-of-the-usual-traffic trek to the airport, hearts SO VERY grateful to be heading home.
Papa and I had made a plan before we got to the airport for what we would and would not allow the pushy “helpers” to do for us. Sure enough, the second we got out of the car there were so many Nigerians trying to tell us what we needed and how much money we needed to give them for their help. We had to stand firm. We told them we just needed one or two luggage carts and had to say a dozen times, “No, we’re good. We don’t need any help thanks.” We got out of there for 500 Naira (less than a dollar) to get us one luggage cart. Pretty good! The absurdity of the airport drop-off area is impossible to describe. Mr. Aina (along with a bazillion other vehicles) dropped us on the side of the road, essentially still on the highway, with the airport in the distance. For who knows what reason, the road leading from the main road up to the airport was blocked to cars so in true Nigerian fashion, naturally everyone just dropped the travelers on the side of the highway in the midst of insane traffic so that they could walk their luggage a looooooong way down the highway road to then walk up another looooooong road to get to the airport. Not gonna lie. It was a bit scary. At first when we got out of the car, I didn’t realize how far we were in relation to the airport. It took a minute of walking for me to register what was happening. Papa pushed a huge stack of maxed-out suitcases in the luggage cart. I had a backpack and two suitcases to drag. Each of the three boys also had a backpack and one suitcase to drag. Before we had even started walking, Anders almost got run over by a pickup truck who was inching forward at the drop-off spot and of course AJ was out of his line of sight. I yanked him back and yelled at the driver. Terrifying! It was no easy task navigating all the kids and luggage through the pothole ridden roads. At least once we got to the road leading to the airport, it was pedestrian only. At one point, poor Papa unknowing drove the luggage cart over a massive pot hole and the heavy suitcases spilled over.
Needless to say we were hot and sweaty by the time we made it to the terminal. Right at the entrance, all the suitcases/bags had to be put on a belt for an initial scan then we brought them over to the line at the check-in counter. The airport definitely had a different feel on the departures side. In a good way. There were signs everywhere saying they don’t condone bribes and one of the guys at the entrance refused a tip when dad tried to give him one. It was shocking. I didn’t know there was a single soul in Nigeria who would decline a handout! Papa was nice enough to take 2 of our suitcases on his Delta flight which left me with just 4 large suitcases and a bag of booster seats to check. The check-in process was anything but quick. It was chaotic and different than what we’re used to. First you stick your suitcases one-by-one on a bathroom scale. The lady places a sticker on your bag to indicate that it’s an appropriate weight. Ours were all at the max weight. Then you wait in another line to have your passports checked. Then you head to a table and one-by-one place your checked bags up there, unzip them and the attendant looks through the contents. The lady who was looking over ours was pretty curt. She told me at the beginning that my eyes have to stay on the open bag at all times while she is inspecting. Well I had three crazy little boys standing behind me in this crowded, sketchy Lagos airport. They were getting antsy and rambunctious. They had already lived through a long day. They were hot, tired and hungry. And they had to pee. So you can imagine the scene. Multiple times I would just glance over my shoulder to make sure they were good (and make sure they were still there!) and EVERY time the lady would say in irritation, “Ma’am you have to keep your eyes here at all times.” She would say, “It’s for your safety.” I wanted to be like— well, it’s for the safety of my children that I want to keep an eye on them in this city that is very well known for high crime and kidnapping. The boys still laugh about it, talking about the lady who kept yelling at mom!
There was a super nice guy named Stanley who got us checked in at the United counter. He introduced himself to the three boys and asked them what their names were. He was so friendly and smiley. He filled out my immigration cards for me since he could see that my hands were full. As we waited for Papa to get checked in at the Delta counter, a couple nice Nigerian guys came to talk to us. They told me that they had a bet going whether or not my husband is black. This happened multiple times on the trip because Nigerians think that Luke looks like a black/white mix since his complexion is so much lighter than the Nigerian black! I think we met more friendly Nigerians during check-in at the airport than we had the entire 6 and a half weeks in Lagos! I told the boys that this was more like me and daddy’s experiences in the past when we traveled to Africa… obviously we’re used to standing out because we’re white but it was only in Lagos that we felt judged/hated for it. Everywhere else we’ve been to in Nigeria and Ethiopia, the people are actually excited to see you and like to strike up a friendly conversation. It was refreshing!
Next was another long line for more checking of passports and then a security line. The people running the security line were not too happy with me as I seemed to do everything wrong. They didn’t really explain what they wanted from you until you did it wrong. Then they’d just yell all annoyed. No, don’t take your liquids out of the suitcases. Yes, take your electronics out. No, you have to take your shoes off. Wait, the kids don’t need to take their shoes off. So inefficient. And then the lady was all annoyed with me because our items were on the scanning belt but there were people who had cut ahead of me to go through the x-ray scanner first. She feverishly motioned and yelled for me and the boys to come through but I was like, what do you want me to do? There’s a whole family who cut in front of me. Then when I finally got to go through the x-ray scanner, another lady found a spot on my right hip. She patted it down and I told her I forget I had some naira in my pocket so then of course she asked for a “little something”. I just rolled my eyes and handed her a thousand naira. These people are something else!
Papa’s flight was scheduled to take off at 10:30. Ours at midnight. We had thought that we had gotten to the airport extremely early (I think we were there by about 5 pm) but it was almost 8:00 by the time we got to this point. We were all exhausted and sweaty and hungry. And sweaty. Did I mention that? Wow, I don’t usually have bad B.O. but I did by then! We stopped in a restroom. No toilet paper, even at airport restrooms! We walked around with Papa to try to find some food. We had two readily available options. KFC and an Indome Cafe. Omg. Seemed very apropos. As if we weren’t already sick of KFC and Indome! We opted for KFC. Got ourselves the usual “Celebration Feast Bucket”. The boys devoured it. I tolerated it cuz I needed calories bad. We said bye to Papa (so glad he was able to be with us for the first part of the airport experience!) and headed to our gate. Yippee! ANOTHER long line for a passport check and security. We finally made it to the attendant at the desk and she says, “Did you have a large quantity of liquids in your checked bags?”
I said, “You mean these carry-on bags?”
“No your checked luggage.” (the ones we had checked many hours ago)
“I mean, I have bottles of toiletries like shampoo and lotion. Stuff like that.”
“Were they very big bottles?”
By this point I was getting annoyed. “I mean yeah there were some larger size bottles I guess.”
“OK, well we’re going to have to hold onto your boarding passes and they’re going to bring your suitcases up here to open them and search them in front of you. We’ll let you know when the suitcases arrive.”
“Ohhhkay…?” I said.
Next they made us go through a bizarre security line. You put all your bags (backpacks, purses, carry-on suitcases) up on a table. They make you open them up and they rummage through all the stuff. Then it’s a full pat-down for everyone, including the kids. Take off your shoes and they scan those too. Afterwards, I found a spot for the boys to sit. By this point we had been funneled to a back corner of the building. So hot. Not a shred of AC. So many people. No restroom. Still a couple hours to wait.
An airport attendant then comes up to me and explains that when my suitcases come up to the gate, he’ll let me know so they can search them in my presence. He looks at the three boys sitting on chairs and says, “Now you’re traveling with them?” I say yes. He then says, “Well there isn’t room for all of you where we check out the suitcases so we’ll just bring you back there while the children wait here.” I almost came unglued. Pretty sure my jaw was on the floor and my eyes were five times bigger than normal. I probably came out a little stronger than necessary but the Mama Bear has a way of doing that when it feels like her cubs are being threatened. I really wish I could remember verbatim what I said. I laughed outloud because it was such a crazy request and said something like, “Oh no. Nope, there is NO WAY I am separating from these kids under ANY circumstance. I don’t have another adult traveling with us. It’s just me and them. They HAVE to stay with me.” He then looked at me like I was the crazy one. He says, “Oh, it’s just right over here. We won’t be far away. They’ll be fine here.” My voice got louder. A Nigerian man sitting next to the boys was completely amused by the exchange. He laughed very loudly while eavesdropping on our conversation. (Not that he had to try hard to eavesdrop because I had raised my volume to Nigerian loud.) I said, “Sir, I don’t get firm about much but I am NOT backing down on this. You’re going to have to figure something out. These boys are coming with me wherever I go.” He finally got the message and backed down. “Ok, ok. I got it” he said.
Lots of time went by while we were waiting for them to notify us that our suitcases had arrived. Meanwhile the boys had to pee. Like I said, no restrooms in this stifling, hot back corner. I asked someone how to get a restroom. They said we’d have to exit through security and head down that hallway for a bathroom. We found a small men’s room with the door wide open. No one else in there so I sent the three boys in there and was able to watch them from the hallway. When we came back to the gate, they stopped us at the security line and said to put our bags back up on the table. I was like, “Even though we already did this?” Yup. Another thorough bag search and pat-down. This time there was another airport attendant who we had seen hours before when we were initially checking in with Papa. He was so rude and annoyed with the boys. He must have reprimanded them 6 times as they were searching our bags, “No more wee-wee. You hear me? No more “ssssssss…” (grossly acting out peeing) I saw you earlier. You went to the bathroom 5 times with Papa. You don’t need to go to the toilet anymore.” After the third time of him saying this, I was like “Well if they don’t go in the toilet, the only other option is for them to pee on the floor.” He didn’t appreciate that too much. He just kept addressing the boys telling them they’re not allowed to pee anymore. I talked myself down inside. I was just like, Rachel, it’s not worth it. You’ve made it this far. Don’t lose it now. It’s culturally acceptable in Nigeria for any adult to “parent” another child. Very foreign to us. Anyways… all is well that ends well!
AJ was starting to lose it. He was so tired! I gave him my phone to play games on. By now, there were no seats so I was standing while the boys sat on the floor. Poor Dave was calling me every 10 minutes to check in. He was so nervous about us being there without him. They started boarding around 11:00. I had started to get a little nervous because we still didn’t have our boarding passes back. I kept asking and they kept saying, “your suitcases are coming.” Eventually, the guy who had tried to separate me from the kids came back to me and said, “You’re good to go. Here’s your boarding passes. They put your suitcases through a second time and were able to better see the contents. We don’t have to search them now.” Talk about much ado about nothing!
All of the sudden, a friendly face came walking by. Initially he only saw me and not the boys sitting on the ground. Right away he says, “Rachel! Where are Luke, Ben and Anders?” It was our friend Stanley from the check-in counter. Can’t believe he remembered all of our names. He said hi to each of the boys and brought us ice-cold bottled waters. They had just started boarding (we weren’t supposed to board until group 4). Suddenly Stanley says, “Guys, hurry! Grab your things. Come with me!” He whisked us through the crazy crowds and escorted us right onto the plane helping me stow the luggage above our heads. I thanked him for his kindness and told him that my husband would want to say thank you for being there to help us. It was cool how the timing worked out… Dave had been nervous because his plane in Abuja was supposed to take off before ours did. He was anxious about not having a way to know for sure that we were safe and on our plane while on his 6-hour flight to Frankfurt. Turned out his flight was slightly delayed. As soon as the boys and I boarded our plane, I was able to get a text to Dave to let him know we were on the plane JUST before he took off from Abuja. Seems like a small thing but it meant a lot to him.
Can’t express the relief I felt once we were on that plane knowing that when we landed 10 hours later, we’d be in the U.S.!! I felt so gross. I changed clothes in the airplane bathroom and tried to cover up the smell with my deodorant. Not sure it really helped though. The stench even on my “clean” clothes was so strong. Ah, the smell of Nigeria! All of our clothes had a unique musty smell from the drawers/closets in the apartments. I can’t really describe it but I’ll know it when I smell it again! The flight was smooth. Luke, AJ and I had the three seats in the middle of the plane then Ben was just across the aisle from me. Anders slept most of the flight. Luke and Ben would have watched shows/played video games the entire flight but I did make them sleep for a couple hours eventually. I’m usually incapable of sleeping on a plane but I guess there was an up-side to being exhausted/stressed/so very sleep deprived. I slept off and on the entire flight.
When we landed in D.C., we had to go through customs. It took awhile. After getting through the line, we had to find all of our checked luggage. It was a chaotic mess. Bags and suitcases everywhere. I grabbed 2 luggage carts and said to the boys, “Ok you guys wait right here with the carts. I’m going to go over there to hunt for our bags.” Immediately Ben was like, “Wait mom, is that safe?” (Mind you, I wasn’t going far away. I had set them just a short distance from the luggage belt.) Then it was so cute, it dawned on him quickly and he says, “Oh yeah. That’s right. We’re not in Nigeria anymore.” Sweet boy. He had gotten so used to us keeping them by our sides at ALL times. After dropping our checked bags again, we had yet another security line and a pretty long walk to our gate. I’ll admit, it was torture to have to walk past several Starbucks and American restaurants but unfortunately we didn’t have time to spare. Poor AJ was losing it. He kept crying and telling me how tired his legs were. We made it to the gate, waited for awhile at the counter while they switched seats around so we could sit next to each other. Ran to the restroom, filled up water bottles and grabbed some salads from a grab-n-go station. Even though it was only like 7 am east coast time, we devoured those salads as soon as we got on the plane. Even Anders shoveled in the greens!
After landing at DIA, walking to the baggage claim, I definitely got tears in my eyes. And then of course as soon as I spotted Mary at the baggage claim, I lost it. Words can’t describe how good it felt to be home. Mary had brought our Sequoia to pick us up. My mom had sent yummy snacks and drinks for the ride home. I made Mar stop at Starbucks drive thru for an iced coffee on our way. And then Mom was at our house along with Grandma and Grandpa (Dave’s parents). It was a warm welcome from them and our sweet neighbors, Brad and Lucy. The boys wasted no time and immediately ran around outside playing in the yard they had missed so much. Papa had arrived to Denver just an hour or two before us. Dave was now in the air from Frankfurt to Denver. Miles picked him up that afternoon. (Like I said, I'll have Dave write up his perspective and post that soon!)
……………………………………….
We think of Peter and Zion all the time. I have their pictures right next to my kitchen sink. It reminds me of when you sponsor a needy child in another country and have their picture on your fridge. I think to myself almost every time I see their picture— how amazing… these are OUR kids. It’s so helpful and special to send money to help change a kid’s life who has very little. But what a privilege that we actually get to bring these two home. To OUR home. To be in our lives forever. It will be such a special day when we finally get to bring them home!!!
For now, they are so well-loved. Our friend Peter Fretheim has put together a whole team of people who are strategically caring for these boys. Peter and Zion are living with Dan and Elizabeth. They have their own beds and toys and school supplies. They have an outdoor area to play in. They have 2 people assigned to them each day to carry out a specific schedule including Bible time, play time, school time, snack time, etc. We’ve been blown away by the intentionality of this team of people who have sacrificially jumped in to care for these two during this transition period. They are deliberately reminding them of their Fritzler family in the U.S. who is planning to come get them as soon as they can. They are caring for their physical, emotional, mental and spiritual needs. It’s just amazing!! They’re even trying to incorporate some American meals to help the boys prepare for eating different kinds of food. We could not have dreamed up a better situation for them in our wildest imaginations! Please pray for Dan and Elizabeth and the whole team of others who are taking care of them. Pray for strength and stamina. For joy and direction. Pray for sleep. Peter especially struggles with consistent sleep and we know firsthand that can get so tiring for the caregivers!!
We are working on getting all the documentation together to file for their U.S. immigration (It’s called the I-600 process). Sounds like it’s a minimum of 4 months before we’d receive approval but who knows! We were told a minimum of 8 weeks in-country for the first trip and we were only there for 6 and a half! Keep those prayers coming!
